Just Be Yourself
In a world full of sheep, be a flamingo.
Just be you. Everyone else is taken.
Never be afraid to sparkle.
Choose people who love you just as you are without you needing to change.
Don’t compare yourself to anyone else.
No matter how smart, beautiful, funny, successful or popular we are, we all have things we don’t like about ourselves.
It’s Ok To Not Be Ok Sometimes
We all have bad days…some of us more than others.
We all have struggles…some of us more than others.
A smile may be hiding a thousand tears, crippling anxiety, depression or an illness that no one can see.
We are all in a storm together, we are just in different boats and different seas.
Lean on loved ones and ask for help. It doesn’t make you weak or a failure. Talk about it.
Be kind to yourself.
Self care and self love is important.
We are all enough. Just as we are.
Always Speak The Truth
Don’t be naïve in life.
Be street-smart. Don’t take everything at face value.
We may tell a thousand lies for months or even years to avoid the truth, a decision, or to protect someone’s feelings.
Recognize that loved ones may lie to you if they have a good reason to.
If a loved one has lied to you before, they may lie to you again.
Your partner, family or friends may not always have your best interests at heart so be kind to yourself.
Address that feeling in your gut that tells you something is wrong or someone is lying to you. Listen to it. It’s usually right.
If you don’t want to be liar, then be honest with everyone, not just certain people. Not being a liar means telling the truth, and being honest with everyone about everything.
Speak your truth especially when it’s really difficult to do so. The harder it is to speak the truth, the more important it is that you do so.
It takes way more strength and courage to tell the truth than it ever does to lie and deny.
Getting vulnerable by being honest no matter the consequences is how we heal, grow and move forward.
“Coming home to the truth is not comfortable, but it has a warmth that burning down a commitment to bullshit provides. There, in the ashes, is you” Mark Groves, @Createthelove
Recognize When It’s Right & When It’s Time To Say Goodbye
Don’t sacrifice your well-being, integrity, character or sense of self for anyone or anything.
You will be able to be completely yourself with the right person/people.
Anyone you have to change for, behave in a particular way for, or walk on eggshells for is not your person/people.
If you know you are not meant to be with someone or know that you do not love your partner, end the relationship. Otherwise you are just living a lie.
Ignored truths will always cause great pain.
Staying in a relationship, and going through the motions for the kids, the apartment, money or because you just don’t have the heart to tell the truth will keep you stuck and unhappy.
You might sacrifice your mental health, your emotional well-being, your integrity for the sake of ‘staying together’, not being alone or avoiding being the ‘bad guy’ but more pain and hurt is caused that way. You are just prolonging the inevitable and avoiding hard truths that you shouldn’t be together…
So recognize when it’s time to say goodbye when a relationship isn’t working. And act on it.
Make decisions based on how things are today, not how they used to be or how they could be. Make decisions based on who your partner is today, right now. If they never change and the relationship never changes would you have a happy. healthy, fulfilling relationship or would you be unhappy or settling?
Assume that things will always be as they are today and make your decision based on that. If things are exactly the same or worse in a year would you want to stay? and would you be happy?
Beware of sunken cost fallacy; don’t base decisions to stay in a relationship purely on the time or money you have already invested in it.
Life Is Short
Put yourself first. Not just for you but for those who matter to you.
Always be true to yourself. Don’t lose yourself trying to keep other people happy.
You get one shot at life. There is no do-over. Don’t look back with regrets because you choose people or situations that were not right for you or made you unhappy.
Face your fears. Fear is just false evidence appearing real so feel the fear and do it anyway. Whatever it is you are scared about. Just go for it.
Don’t stay stuck and unhappy because you are scared.
Learn to walk away from unhappy situations. It’s OK to end a relationship or quit a job that isn’t right.
Gemma Lawrence is the creator of This Brits Life. Born and raised in England, she has been living in British Columbia, Canada as a permanent resident since 2016. A solo traveler for the past 9 years, she hopes to inspire and help others to enjoy solo adventures too. As someone who has always struggled with her self-confidence and mental health, she also shares tips and inspirational stories relating to self-love, self-care, and mental health.